[ When everyone is with their friends and family, I am sitting here,staring at books and notes. :'O My heart is just eager to go back and celebrate with them. Another year celebrating myself in this room. Alone. ahh.whyyy..] Anyway, forget about this. I shall start the year happy and thinking on the positive note. Be happy, Alie. :/ 

anyhow,looking back, 2013 has been a year of challenges. Couldn't remember doing anything significant but felt more of personal struggles within me. Lots of burden in my heart that I couldn't really express. I remember feeling tired and just wanting to slack off from every responsibilities that I carry. I remember feeling far from God and wondering where is He all these while. I remember feeling I am not good enough and I am not capable to carry it through. There's a lot of fears that I didn't want to face and times when I decided to creep into a hole and hide. That's all I wanted to do... 

[oh, what a failure.. ] 

But looking back also, I realized that hey, at least I managed to pull it through. Not by my strength but I can see God slowly working through the issues in my heart. It's not easy to clean dirt from the plant but it take time. And I know that He is there with me even though I couldn't see Him at work. (Gosh, my eyes are kinda blind sometimes.) I know that the process is still not complete and probably it will be brought forward to the new year. Well, I am not in a rush also. 

And so, all I can say is just a big Thank You to God, my sustainer and pillar of love,strength and hope. Thank you for never leaving me even when sometimes I do. 

I hope 2014 will be better. To see more change in more and be brave enough to take on chances, experience more of people and cultures. 

It's time to do and believe that I can do even more that this. Go on and do what you like, and at the same time, bringing joy to the people around you. =D 

will end with this song : 

You dance over me
While I am unaware
You sing all around
But I never hear the sound

Lord, I'm amazed by You
Lord, I'm amazed by You
Lord, I'm amazed by You
How You love me

You paint the morning sky
With miracles in mind
My hope will always stand
For You hold me in Your hand

Lord, I'm amazed by You
Lord, I'm amazed by You
Lord, I'm amazed by You
How You love me

How wide, how deep
How great is Your love for me
How wide, how deep
How great is Your love for me

-Amazed