- Sunday, January 05, 2014
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[ When everyone is with their friends and family, I am sitting here,staring at books and notes. :'O My heart is just eager to go back and celebrate with them. Another year celebrating myself in this room. Alone. ahh.whyyy..] Anyway, forget about this. I shall start the year happy and thinking on the positive note. Be happy, Alie. :/
anyhow,looking back, 2013 has been a year of challenges. Couldn't remember doing anything significant but felt more of personal struggles within me. Lots of burden in my heart that I couldn't really express. I remember feeling tired and just wanting to slack off from every responsibilities that I carry. I remember feeling far from God and wondering where is He all these while. I remember feeling I am not good enough and I am not capable to carry it through. There's a lot of fears that I didn't want to face and times when I decided to creep into a hole and hide. That's all I wanted to do...
[oh, what a failure.. ]
But looking back also, I realized that hey, at least I managed to pull it through. Not by my strength but I can see God slowly working through the issues in my heart. It's not easy to clean dirt from the plant but it take time. And I know that He is there with me even though I couldn't see Him at work. (Gosh, my eyes are kinda blind sometimes.) I know that the process is still not complete and probably it will be brought forward to the new year. Well, I am not in a rush also.
And so, all I can say is just a big Thank You to God, my sustainer and pillar of love,strength and hope. Thank you for never leaving me even when sometimes I do.
I hope 2014 will be better. To see more change in more and be brave enough to take on chances, experience more of people and cultures.
It's time to do and believe that I can do even more that this. Go on and do what you like, and at the same time, bringing joy to the people around you. =D
will end with this song :
You dance over me
While I am unaware
You sing all around
But I never hear the sound
Lord, I'm amazed by You
Lord, I'm amazed by You
Lord, I'm amazed by You
How You love me
You paint the morning sky
With miracles in mind
My hope will always stand
For You hold me in Your hand
Lord, I'm amazed by You
Lord, I'm amazed by You
Lord, I'm amazed by You
How You love me
How wide, how deep
How great is Your love for me
How wide, how deep
How great is Your love for me
While I am unaware
You sing all around
But I never hear the sound
Lord, I'm amazed by You
Lord, I'm amazed by You
Lord, I'm amazed by You
How You love me
You paint the morning sky
With miracles in mind
My hope will always stand
For You hold me in Your hand
Lord, I'm amazed by You
Lord, I'm amazed by You
Lord, I'm amazed by You
How You love me
How wide, how deep
How great is Your love for me
How wide, how deep
How great is Your love for me
-Amazed
- Tuesday, December 31, 2013
- 0 Comments
" God can only use a clean vessel."
Realized that, God wants to use us more than we want to be used by Him.
-Hope Peninsular Convention
- Tuesday, December 03, 2013
- 0 Comments
Trying to stop it
but my mind won't let it.
True repentance comes when you decided not to go back to your old ways
and your life is changed.
if not, it isn't
at all.
;
;
;
;
;
;
romans 12:1
;
;
;
;
;
;
romans 12:1
- Friday, November 08, 2013
- 0 Comments
Silence is golden?
- Sunday, November 03, 2013
- 0 Comments
I wonder whether are relationships meant to be like this?
to let go but not letting go?
to breathe but not too much?
it's hard.
both need to give and take
Give love
Take love
Give time
Take time
Give thoughts
Take thoughts
Give words
Take words
Give heart
Take heart
both need to learn from one another
Only know you've been high when you're feeling low
Only hate the road when you're missin' home
Only know you love her when you let her go
Only hate the road when you're missin' home
Only know you love her when you let her go
-Passenger
- Wednesday, October 30, 2013
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sometimes it is tiring and wonder whether what I am doing is good enough. I always have to think whether if I spend time by myself and not thinking about other people and not catching up with people, am I being too selfish?
It has taken a toll on me and this previous week was too much of people around me that I decided to go on an alone trip to the mall. Just being myself there and trying to think things through. People.Me. God.
There's just too much of thoughts that I need to arrange myself properly before I start another week of the same routine again.
Realizing that it's not easy at all to make sure that everyone is ok and that they are taken care of. some just felt like breaking down, some people are always saying they are ok, and some are always happy. And me, I try to be there for each one but I felt so unequipped and lacked that I felt like I didn't give my all. I felt so helpless. I want to be there, and I want to let them know that I care. but I didn't.
But, well, I know that I have Him, and I know I can be rest assured in Him.
Looking forward for home. I need it.
It has taken a toll on me and this previous week was too much of people around me that I decided to go on an alone trip to the mall. Just being myself there and trying to think things through. People.Me. God.
There's just too much of thoughts that I need to arrange myself properly before I start another week of the same routine again.
Realizing that it's not easy at all to make sure that everyone is ok and that they are taken care of. some just felt like breaking down, some people are always saying they are ok, and some are always happy. And me, I try to be there for each one but I felt so unequipped and lacked that I felt like I didn't give my all. I felt so helpless. I want to be there, and I want to let them know that I care. but I didn't.
But, well, I know that I have Him, and I know I can be rest assured in Him.
Looking forward for home. I need it.
- Monday, October 28, 2013
- 1 Comments
